asdf forums

first of all, society is not its own entity that has the ability to make its own decisions.
there are certain groups or even specific people that can be held responsible for particular aspects of society. i see 'Society' as a mask worn by the whole mass of people, really kind of a nice carpet to walk on.
in truth we really ARE the media and the society, in being. don't say that society is all that crappy because you do your part in shaping it as something that hates itself.
sure, it will fall apart someday. it will fall again and again with only a few people still standing to support it, desperate to keep their personalised world in shape.
there will never be a time where everyone will all agree on the same thing. that's why society is one of the most chaotic things to remain.

They say society has lost its finesse.

umm...
I need help with human socialisation. like, not being awkward. ._.

People are stupid and won't be able to comprehend you, deal with it. If you find someone who does, don't let go of them. If you don't, I wouldn't bother mantaining anything other than superficial relations because when you spend enough time with average people, you tend to become like them.

I don't think it's that simple. not being able to hang around average people kind of sucks because, well, you're going to deal with a lot of average people, whatever you do.

and I'm not sure what 'not being awkward' is. if you mean you say the wrong things to people, then there's really no problem, because almost everyone does that at some point. almost everyone that I met that thought they were awkward wasn't really awkward. I thought I was awkward, and then I went to university. granted, I went into a program where there were lots and lots of nerds (engineering) but once you find the right kind of thing to talk about, you can pretty much get along with anyone.

I see what you mean about that, and there are people who have the same type of mind as I do, but when I'd like to talk to them, I feel intimidated by their knowledge, being around average people most of the time. and I might just be thinking I'm awkward because I don't think i know who I am or who I want to be... it would really be easier to understand if I was able to describe the situation in detail but I'd rather not... D:
I don't want to have to pretend I'm someone else but I just don't know how to begin a conversation about something very deep for starters..

it's usually a good idea to get to know the person before you start talking about something serious. the more you get to know a person, the conversations you have with that person just naturally leads to more serious stuff, at least that's what happens for me. one moment we were talking about how circling around the north pole is time travel, or something silly like that, and the next moment we were talking religion.

and don't feel intimidated by someone who knows more than you. there's probably a lot you can learn from them, and most people aren't going to go "lol you're dumb for not knowing this go away." they probably like showing off what they know anyway

cyan wrote:I don't want to have to pretend I'm someone else but I just don't know how to begin a conversation about something very deep for starters..

i hear you, i totally feel the same quite often. And I just hate smalltalk, and can't do it.

cyan wrote:I see what you mean about that, and there are people who have the same type of mind as I do, but when I'd like to talk to them, I feel intimidated by their knowledge, being around average people most of the time. and I might just be thinking I'm awkward because I don't think i know who I am or who I want to be... it would really be easier to understand if I was able to describe the situation in detail but I'd rather not... D:
I don't want to have to pretend I'm someone else but I just don't know how to begin a conversation about something very deep for starters..

Please don't take this offensively, but for the first bit there, it might be because, sub-consciously, you feel smarter and more superior to the average people, and you've grown accustomed to that, so then you start hanging around people of your own intelligence, and your sub-conscious doesn't know what to do because all of a sudden, your not the superior one anymore, and it starts to get a bit freaked out. Again, please don't take that offensively, it's a theory and I've seen it happen before.

And you don't have to pretend your someone else. If you wanna talk to someone, just be friendly, say hi, that kind of thing, and before you know it, your in a deep conversation. It doesn't even usually happen intentionally, it's just like, you start talking, you might bring up something, you both kind of mutually acknowledge each others intelligence, and then things start going more and more in depth. It all just kind of works out, but sometimes, you just have to be brave, step out, and make the first move, instead of waiting for people to talk to you kinda thing.

Huh, it sounded better in my head.

no, man, I see what you mean, and I appreciate everything that all of you guys have said. thanks a lot

cyan wrote:umm...
I need help with human socialisation. like, not being awkward. ._.

lolz

That wasn't very nice.
And welcome. ASDF will take care of you for now on...

That was not very nice either.

Greetings, in the name of asdf!

New person on board here, so I guess I'll just dive straight into it before I get caught up in stage fright. I've been browsing through this thread a lot, and in the end I figured I could just as well have a go. Who knows, maybe your great and all-powerful wisdom will be able to help where others have not?

- How The Hell Do I Stop Procrastinating?
Putting things off might be my greatest flaw. Not very uncommon, I'm aware, and perhaps a product of this day and age - but it's getting to the point where it's becoming a problem. Ever since I was very young, I had a tendency to forget unpleasant things to an extreme level; often, I would simply push whatever issue I had to the back of my mind and then toss away the key. Imagine all the homework that got the boot from my internal server, for instance...
But now, it's more than that. I literally completely repress if someone has done something I percieve as hurtful; for instance, I was talking to a friend just yesterday and he was re-telling a story from our past to a third party. He said something along the lines of "that might be the first time me and her actually yelled at eachother" and I went "what? We've never done that?". It took him at least thirty minutes to make me remember such a rather important event, and when it finally dawned on me the memory was crystal clear; I had never really forgotten it in the first place, obviously - just refused to acknowledge it.
With this denial of course come procrastinating; and here is where the practical issue comes. The previously mentioned is merely the emotional side, but since I'm currently studying on university-level not to mention struggling to write a book - this irritating habit is certainly rocking my boat.
Instead of actually writing the story I have in my head, I start browsing the web (guess how I got here?). Instead of actually reading my book for my next seminar, I'm writing a damn forum post.

Now, I'm aware. There's a rather simple solution - Stop It. Start doing things. Get a hold of yourself. Yet, while all of these are very good advice indeed, they're merely the "end product" of a chain that needs to get set into motion. ...and, recently, getting that ball rolling has been going uphill.
Maybe I'm just a big, lazy bum (not impossible at all), but if so - how do I fight my laziness?

Greetings Shinsomething! (is that a type of martial arts or food?)
Welcome to the ASDForums ™ !


I don't think I can help you much, since I'm a procrastinator myself.. but I guess a good start would be from time to time reassessing the benefits/end results of each and every task that needs to be done. And reminding yourself how good it feels to actually not have anything "over your head", not having to push things in the back of your head. Freedom So it's worth to catch up sometimes.

atomtengeralattjaro wrote:Greetings Shinsomething! (is that a type of martial arts or food?)
Welcome to the ASDForums ™ !

Thank you! And indeed it is, how could you ever know? In fact, it is both; developed in ancient China, it was formed under the the Great Sage A. SDF-SAMA, and has since been a secret art passed down through the generations. It's meaning - Truth/Sincerity - alludes to how you find enlightment when going through the various katas; the first resembling an A, the second a B... And so forth. As a spin-off, a proud pupil who had been inspired by the glow of ASDF, also made a recipe based on it - usually known as "noodles" here in the west, and the great sustenance for many a poor (yet always faithful!) student.

atomtengeralattjaro wrote:I don't think I can help you much, since I'm a procrastinator myself.. but I guess a good start would be from time to time reassessing the benefits/end results of each and every task that needs to be done. And reminding yourself how good it feels to actually not have anything "over your head", not having to push things in the back of your head. Freedom So it's worth to catch up sometimes.

...aaaand, back to the topic at hand. Ah yes, the awarding-method. I agree with you; It does work from time to time! I sort of forced myself into it when I had my exams last semester. However, I might actually have googled up a strategy for at least the writing part: www.writeordie.com
How could I ever have missed such a wonderful thing? I just wrote 1183 words in thirty minutes. At least it's something!

Either way, thanks for your advice!

I may or may not be posting this while I'm supposed to be working, so I don't know if I have any useful advice for you. I do know that getting things done is a lot less stressful than having a mountain of things looming over your head, though.

Now, I think that I may or may not get back to work...

Welcome to the ASDForums™! ASDF will take care of you from now on...

Now, about the procrastinating, I am one myself so I recognize a lot of the things you are talking about. I have been trying to procrastinate less myself so I've come across some tips that might help.

First of all, you could try to start doing petty tasks, like cleaning away some laundry that is laying around (I know I have a lot of that...), then working your way up towards greater tasks, like writing an essay. The point is really just to start doing something productive and then get the engine going from there.
What you also need to do is to catch yourself in the process of procrastinating, then close all the stuff that's irrelevant to the task at hand and start actually working.
Another thing I've heard works is to plan ahead a lot. Make a list for what you're going to do the entire day. When you should work, when you should have breaks, when you should eat and so on. Remember that it's important to have breaks throughout the day. You can try to have a little schedule where you work an hour and then have a break for half an hour, during the break you should not be doing any work at all.

I hope this helps, I'm sure there are lots more stuff that you could do, but you get the gist of it. The hardest part is actually starting to do any of these things...

Shinjitsu wrote:However, I might actually have googled up a strategy for at least the writing part: http://www.writeordie.com
How could I ever have missed such a wonderful thing? I just wrote 1183 words in thirty minutes. At least it's something!

Either way, thanks for your advice!

That's a lot in my book
But then again, I'm not really a good writer...

~Shai

There is nothing wrong with procrastination. Necessity is the mother of innovation - when facing a deadline the pressure can help generate your best ideas. I learned an entire semester of International Business in one weekend. Wrote a 30 page research paper that I got an 'A' on. Had I took my time and planned it out over several weeks I might not have done as well.

We attach this false value on 'not procrastinating.' I'm not sure where that comes from, but there's nothing wrong with procrastination in my opinion.

But for those of you who have judged procrastination to be bad, I am reminded of a Chinese fortune cookie that offered great advice on the matter: Stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.